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E-raamat: Welcome to Motherhood, Bitches: The Real Guide to Pregnancy, Birth and Beyond

  • Formaat: EPUB+DRM
  • Ilmumisaeg: 17-Feb-2022
  • Kirjastus: HarperCollins
  • Keel: eng
  • ISBN-13: 9780008453565
  • Formaat - EPUB+DRM
  • Hind: 10,59 €*
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  • See e-raamat on mõeldud ainult isiklikuks kasutamiseks. E-raamatuid ei saa tagastada.
  • Formaat: EPUB+DRM
  • Ilmumisaeg: 17-Feb-2022
  • Kirjastus: HarperCollins
  • Keel: eng
  • ISBN-13: 9780008453565

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The real guide to pregnancy, birth and beyond.





Im assuming youve picked up this book because youre either curious about having kids, youre currently up the duff, or youre stumbling through the early days of parenthood with a mattress-sized sanitary towel between your legs wondering what the hell has just happened. That, or youre killing time in WHSmith, waiting for your flight to Ibiza. You lucky bastard.



Either way, this book is your pregnancy, birth and postpartum BFF.



Welcome to Motherhood, Bitches is your one-stop, no-filter guide to everything from swollen vulvas and dinner-plate areolas; from shitting in labour to the horror of postpartum haemorrhoids; from mindless sleep deprivation to salvaging a sex life when your pelvic floor has hit the floor. But mainly, its a reassuring reminder that feeling slightly (or shockingly) out of control with a newborn baby human is entirely normalwe promise.

Arvustused

Nobody and I mean nobody has a way with words quite like Victoria. Candid, reassuring and laugh-out-loud hilarious, this book feels like a friend giving a series of pep talks during the hurricane season of pregnancy and new motherhood. Sarah Turner, The Unmumsy Mum



Striding confidently into all the topics the antenatal and baby groups tiptoe around. This gritty, honest, useful and at times, hilarious guide needs to be handed out with pregnancy notes. Victoria is the foul-mouthed, taboo-embracing, funny-anecdote-sharing, wildly-knowledgeable mate I needed through pregnancy and beyond. Laugh, gasp, learn lots and feel shoulder-dropping relief that youre not alone. Your parenting bookshelf may be rammed, but nudge them down. Make space for this one, trust me. Anna Mathur, psychotherapist and bestselling author

Muu info

The debut from Victoria Emes
1 Introduction
1(4)
2 Pregnancy
5(28)
There's an alien in my uterus
3 Birth Preparation
33(22)
Getting ready to ruin your vagina
4 Pre-Labour
55(32)
I think a poo might be coming
5 Labour
87(26)
Oh, that poo is a fucking baby!
6 Pushing and Delivery
113(18)
Squeezing a human watermelon out of your hole
7 The Aftermath
131(22)
Don't look down
8 Birth Stories
153(10)
9 Welcome to Babygeddon
163(30)
10 Breastfeeding
193(30)
Attack of the nipple-nibbling piranha
11 Sleep
223(24)
The battle of bedtime
12 Body Confidence
247(22)
Learning to love your digestive biscuit areolas
13 Post-Natal Sex
269(18)
Bracing your blubbery blowhole for impact
14 Loneliness
287(20)
Marooned on the Island of Motherhood
15 Conclusion
307(4)
Acknowledgements 311
Victoria Emes is Instagrams unfiltered mum-hood legend, who accidentally rose to fame during her maternity leave where she began to document the realities of being a mum online. With two small children, Victoria is exceptionally talented at addressing the unaddressed taboos of raising small humans, and does so through brutal honesty and a sharp wit.